If you haven’t picked up on it during previous posts, I’m the proud father of a beautiful, hilarious, mischievous, lovely little boy who just turned 1. I’ve written pages and pages privately about the experience thus far, but very little publicly. I wanted to reflect on one element of being a parent in Thailand that has never stopped making me laugh and/or frown in equal measure, and that is how Thais – most of the time females – react to kids.

Despite having a child, I’ve always felt that kids should be seen and not heard. Actually, better if they’re not seen either. In fact, for much of my life I was kind of a grumpy dick about kids, and would roll my eyes every time someone showed up with a child in tow. “Great, now I have to watch my language and pretend to be interested in its well-being.” But I’ve softened over the years, to the point where I now really enjoy kids. Okay, I’m lying, I enjoy my own kid. I still don’t care much for other people’s kids.

Anyway, as my wife is Thai, our son is what’s known as a luk-krung (ลูกครึ่ง), aka, someone of mixed race. Luk-krung kids are seen as somewhat unique in Thailand. For various reasons that I won’t get into here, the middle ground of lighter skin, dark eyes/hair, and vaguely Asian features is considered…not sure how to say it – worthy of extra cheek pinches and games of peek-a-boo on the train. Thais are very big on family, and they’re especially big on cute little babies. And speaking objectively, my baby is the cutest baby of all the babies.

That is one good looking kid.

That is one good looking kid.

Anyway, whenever we’re out, he is constantly smiled at, peek-a-boo’d, and touched by strangers. Most of the time it’s funny and cute to see people crowding around his stroller, but it’s also a bit of a double-edged sword – I appreciate that people find him cute, but there are times it’s a bit much. The chain-smoking guy who bends down and says “Hello!” with cigarette smoke wafting out of his nose; the greasy tuk-tuk driver on my soi who takes a break from ripping off tourists to cover his face and say “Boo!” when my son gets pushed by; the old woman who holds her arms out and expects me to hand him to her.

Luk Krung 2

Faces being made while we wait for our food.

What sometimes catches me off guard is when people touch his face or grab his hand – complete strangers, young, old, male, female. In Thailand it’s about showing appreciation or love or affection, but if you did that in many western countries you’d likely get reported to the cops. Indeed, one time at Central World, my wife was walking with him when some old expat dude came up and said “What a cute baby, can I take a picture?” and before my wife could say anything, he took a picture, said thanks, and walked away. Weird.

Sales girls ignoring customers to stare at a baby. The usual.

Sales girls ignoring customers to stare at a baby. The usual.

So where should I draw the line between being sensitive to Thai culture and protective of my kid? Someone playing peek-a-boo is fine, but what about grabbing his hand? What if they just sneezed and have germs? What if they ask to hold him – should I say yes? No? And if no, why? What if it’s a few girls at the mall? What if it’s an old dude at the BTS station?

This guy gave him that balloon and then just squatted there for about 60 seconds touching his arm. Is that weird?

This guy gave him that balloon and then just squatted there for about 60 seconds touching his shoulder. Is that weird?

I don’t really have a point to all this besides showing a few photos I took and saying that if you have a baby in Thailand, be prepared to deal with this. Most Thais probably find it quite normal, but for foreigners, it can take a while to get used to.